I Just Realized, It's A Case Of Bullying

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Elmer and I noticed, Nikki was, although not intensely, being bullied in school by one girl classmate. This never happened last year when she was in Grade 2. That was her first year in that school and she was never with this girl in the same class.

This classmate's name always comes up during my conversation Nikki on how her day at school went. Sometimes, especially when school year was just starting, her stories were not as pleasant as I would like them to be. There was one time daw during lunch, 'yung mga ayaw na food ng classmate niya na 'to who likes to boss her around too, nilalagay sa baunan niya. That's while she was still eating her lunch. Foul 'yan sa akin. Pero sabi ko, sana sinabihan niya ang classmate niya na 'wag gawin 'yun. Oo daw. There was another time when this same classmate had colds and used tissue paper to clean her nose. When all her used tissue already piled up on her desk, inuutusan daw sila (her and her other classmates) to clean her desk up. Foul sa akin 'yan. I asked her if ginawa ba niya. Hindi naman daw. 

But Nikki admitted, sometimes, she would give in as a way para makisama with that classmate. Otherwise, that classmate would ask their other classmates to not talk to or play with her. Ang bad! Naawa ako kay Nikki nun. Sabi ko, if she doesn't stand up, susugurin ko ang classmate niya! Siyempre joke lang 'yun, at alam niya 'yun. I encouraged her to fight (not physically) or answer back if she knows tama siya.

On Wednesday afternoon, when Nikki came home from school, both Elmer and I were sleeping. Apparently, she'd been waiting for either of us to wake up because she had to tell us something that happened to her in school that day. That classmate hit her on the face. I was calm because Nikki looked fine and she said she was fine. Elmer was F.U.R.I.O.U.S. But lemme make it clear, he was furious about what happened and not exactly with the girl. He was quite annoyed too with Nikki because in situations like this, Nikki doesn't retaliate. I find her act righteous. Elmer finds it a sign of weakness. (Oooh, you should know how Elmer was in elementary, how often Mama Shirley would be invited by his principal to the office, how he "kicked his classmate's ass" because he didn't give in to what his classmate demanded him to do and that classmate happened to be the then mayor's son. He was sure one hell of a "naughty" boy.)

Elmer: Anong ginawa mo nung sinuntok ka niya?

Nikki: Wala. Kasi lunch 'yun. Wala si teacher. Pero nakita naman nila Sienna Lou (another classmate).

Elmer: Sana sinapak mo din siya! Ganyan ka naman, 'pag sa ading mo, bawi ka nang bawi. Pagdating sa mga kalaro at classmates mo, tupi ka naman.

I don't agree with Elmer on that. But I understand how he felt. Anak niya 'yung naapi e. But if you come to think of it, that's how one should be to bullies in school - fight back. Otherwise, those bullies would not stop with the bullying. They will not stop until they realize they're not the strongest and the most feared in the pack. They need to find their match. Because the truth is, bullies are weak. Their acts of bullying are just their cover-up. 

Nikki: (In response to what her Daddy said) Kelangan ba gumanti palagi? 'Di ba bad 'yun?

Elmer was quiet. I was pleased. In fair, may natutunan siya sa mga sinasabi namin sa kanya. I could tell if Nikki was the one at fault in situations similar to this. This time, I knew she was innocent. I could tell from how she told us the story and how she reacted when I said, "Pupunta ako school mo bukas. Kakausapin ko nga ang mga classmates mo at 'yang teacher mong bading." She exclaimed with hand gesture, "Yes!". I'm sorry if I still have to describe her teacher like that. He really is bading so if ever he would read this, I know he wouldn't mind. And just to make it clear, I don't have anything against gays. I like them. Okay, klaro 'yan.

Going back. I went there on Thursday. Teacher was not around because he and some other teachers were practicing for the sportsfest. I was not in the mood to talk on Friday. I decided I'd just talk to him after the sportsfest on Saturday. Tuma-timing pa ako when I noticed that Nikki and two other classmates were talking to a crying classmate whose father was standing beside her. Uh-oh, that was the classmate who hit her in the face with her daddy with him. Anlaking mama pa naman ng daddy niya. As I walked up to them to find out what the matter was, I thought sana andun si Elmer kasi magkasinlaki sila. Mapaaway man, kayang kaya niya 'yun. Just in case lang naman. Haha.

Me: (To Nikki) Bakit?

Classmate's daddy was still talking, not to me naman but to his daughter, so deadma lang ako sa kanya. 

Nikki: Siya ang sumuntok sa akin. Sinumbong ko siya sa daddy niya. 

Gusto kong matawa kasi hindi niya siya nakahintay sa aksyon ko. Dinirekta na talaga niya sa daddy ng sumuntok sa kanya. 

Classmate's Daddy: Misis, pasensiya na. Ma-ano kasi ang kamay nito minsan.

I'm not used to being called "Misis". Technically, I'm not. Tsaka anong ma-ano?! Pero gets ko na ang ibig niya sabihin opkors. 

Me: Ah, oo nga po. Sinuntok nga daw po niya 'to sa mukha. Okay na po. 'Wag na lang po sana maulit.

Then Nikki and I left. 'Wag na talaga dapat maulit, kundi ako na ang sasapak sa anak niya. Jooowk!

I always have in mind, things like this are just kids stuff. Away-bati, away-bati. They can handle it themselves, the kids way, depende na lang how and what their parents teach them at home. Parents should stay away from it. Pero dapat pangaralan kung ano ang dapat gawin. (Elmer, are you reading that?) I always tell Nikki to always be the better kid. But if pisikalan na, dapat may adult intervention. I wish I can be there with Nikki in school everyday. I just told Nikki to stay away from that classmate. Obviously, she has problems.

And with how Calli acts up now, hindi ko maiwasang matakot para sa sarili ko. ^_^

Ciao! ♥